#254

12 June 2011

"Your mind is powerful. It can lead you to success or ultimate failure."

All i do here is sleep!

couldn't wake up in the morning for morning prayers. the time for morning prayers is 3.45am by the way.

and i slept till it was time for breakfast. went back to eat breakfast which was basically fruits cos i didnt feel like eating their rice and etc etc. went to find dad after that.

have i mentioned i went to visit their super duper big kitchen? its madness to prepare so much food! (practically in pails) their pots and pans are like 1000000X larger than what we have at home.

alright exaggeration.

but you get what i mean.

and after that it was

*SIGH* SLEEP AGAIN.

woke up in the afternoon for prayers before lunch. to commemorate the 8th death anniversary of their teachers, the one i saw many years ago, before he passed away. we ate lunch with the puny yoghurt spoon instead of the big spoon cos our spoons went missing ):

you probably can guess what i did after this.

(YES SLEEP)

dad says its cos of the atmosphere here and the air humidity difference and idk what. all i knw is i want to sleeeeep.

I THINK IM JUST LAZY LA OKAY.

made dinner after evening prayers. okay its actually just cup noodles ahahhahaa.

my lips are so dry but i forgot my lip balm. ):

we had a short meditation during the short evening prayers. and suddenly i felt refreshed. i wasn't so tired anymore. this feeling is something i haven't felt before, especially these 6 months. i realized that in life we seek many answers, and live for the future, neglecting the present. we worry about many things, and these things cause us to never be able to find peace from within. we can't feel happy. we have too much in our heads, too much worry when all we should really be worrying about is when we would stop breathing, because no matter how hard life is, the only time when it all really ends is when breathing ceases.

Deep down i started to realize that i wont be able to find my inner peace, not when my mind is filled with all the hurt, pain and questions.

i wont know what tomorrow brings, but i do know that the drama for the next few days in sri lanka would cease. im far from drama, and im glad at it.

reality is something that i cant hide away from forever, but if i believe, i know what happiness can do to the reality of mine.

time can heal certain sort of pain. if things can be forgotten, i learnt that you shouldn't let it haunt you back by recounting to others if you can't let go. All you will do is reopen wounds and deepen your hate.

the serenity gets into you. it got into me.

#253

11 June 2011

Huda's Birthday today! (:

"Go to anywhere with an open heart to accept. and do anything with an open mind to adapt."

and i am already in sri lanka at this time.

Sri lanka's time zone lags behind by 2½ hours.

The first thing we were greeted with was their duty free shop after clearing their customs.

THEY SELL HOUSEHOLD APPLIANCES AT THE ARRIVAL HALL.

i really mean household appliances, like refrigerators, washing machines, televisions, etc. and alot of tech stuffs.

TOTALLY UNLIKE ALL OTHER DFS i came about.

awesome right.

okay im joking.

have i mentioned that i got a free upgrade to business class cos economy class was full?

idk how it happened but yeah anw i gotta love emirates for that.

their service in biz class is (Y)

we reached at 2.15AM (S.L time)

oh and one thing i learnt there? dont change your money with government banks. the rates will all be fixed. the private banks can give you much better rates.

AND THEIR SERVICE IS REALLY SLOW.

its like they have all the time in the world.

Just changing the money and buying a sim card took 1½ hours.

MAD OR WHAT!

omg and the whole time all i wanted to do was sit on the bus so that i can sleep.

im serious.

eh but then again you can't blame me.

i mean, its 2.15 am (SGT 4.45am), way past my bed time.

their sun is glaringly bright.

you really squint when there is the sun saying hi to you.

and the ride can get pretty bumpy.

but people like me can just fall asleep when i want to sleep so to me, its nothing.

LOL!

honestly i like the life there. if i spoke their language, had no worries in the world, i might stay there even!

we stopped by their teahouse/cafe where they served milk tea where you get to add your own sugar. (if you let them add it yourself you would be drinking sugar) and i notice they love to use the spice marsala. (and no, i dont like that)

their bakery sells alot of things, and they dont store their loaves of bread properly. they leave it in the open. okay i dw think about the creepy crawlies on shelves.

and we continued our journey on the primary school but cute like anything bus.

I SAW A POLICE POST IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD.

its damn crazy. like a small police post in the middle of a turnabout.

super cool! oh but bus move too fast for me to capture a shot ):

I SAW A RAILWAY TRAIN RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY EYES.

yeah i know. i can see the same thing at bukit timah.

but this railway track i saw crossed roads. i mean, all cars had to stop for it to go. omggg hen cool leh i like!!!!!!

when we finally reached, we settled down and went to have breakfast. they eat those set yoghurt for every meal. its super fantastic. im so in love with yoghurt. after touring the meditation centre we went to help give out lunch. great experience. and omgosh they do this twice a day everyday.

OH AND THEY USE WOOD TO COOK.

because gas is really expensive up in the mountains.

Everything over at where i was is really basic, but you don't feel like you need anything else. It's like enough for you.

their food's spicy man, although it looked so harmless.

we continued walking around after lunch and went to join in a meditation group.

actually i didnt get the essence of meditation. i couldnt accept what i heard while i meditated. its as if i had a mind of my own and my mind didnt want to accept it because it was filled with a lot of other thoughts of my own.

Things will get better though, i'll find my answers.

#252

03 June 2011

Yijun's birthday today!

I don't remember if i lied to her alot.

okay i dont remember my lies.

but i know all of us pretended to 'FORGET' her birthday!

and she was really sad when none of us mentioned a thing.

till we went into CJ.

and she saw her cake.

OMG IMAGINE HER FACE.

and then we went to walk around after that cos we wanted to go to tanjong pagar for dinner.

with LY and ZY!

met them all at the MRT station.

she got shocked i think.

and then we took a bus down together and had dinner while waiting for joanne. tsk

joanne late again.

had those fruit tarty cake!

and then we went home tgther in circle line! :D

07 June 2011

Met yijun and zy for kungfu panda!

omg when it was a child it was so cuteeeeeeeeeeeeee.

actually this cartoon is not bad you know.

its hilarious for most parts of the show.

and i enjoyed it even though i didnt even watch part 1.

so its awesomely awesome (:

*btw i like the word awesome. thats why i use it incessantly. haha!

10 June 2011

Met girls at vivo for lunch!

reached abit late but still earlier than has to buy a cake.

met up with has in front of breadtalk

and then went off to harbourfrontcentre tgther to wait for the other two

WHO WENT TO WATCH KF2 tgther again after 3 years?

HAHA

i wonder if they sat couple seat again seriously.

okay i shall stop joking.

i love the girls because despite how we seem so distant at times, we are all the same when we meet up. we just catch up with one another, and end up having 100% fun.

got onto my flight at night after being super busy the minute i got home.

oh the amount of sleep i get is really.

so enjoyable.

HAHA

Strength

Where do you find your strength?

When something really hard crashes into our world, where do we turn to?

some of the things we count on: our family, friends, people we love, things we love to do.

there are so many more.

But when something really really hurts you, you have to remember that they can make it all better, but its up to yourself to pick yourself up from the fall and continue walking forward.

Time.

It can't heal all the pain, but it can allow you to replace unhappy memories with happy ones. You've got to let go to accept the happiness that is waiting to enter your life.

i've fallen before. i've had my fair share of downs enough for me to wise up and mellow down. i've learnt to pick myself up. i've learnt to grow up. i've been through many phases in life for me to start telling stories and theories of my own.

It's not easy to pick yourself up after falling time and again. But one thing i know for sure, each time you stand up, you learn something. You do, whether you see it now or 10, 20 years down the road. It pieces up what kind of person you were, have become, and will be. They are your own stories to tell. You have the decision to make with regards to how great you want it to be or how sad you want it to be.

You dont have to be strong for anyone else if you can't even answer to yourself. We all have our moments, moments where we just want to crawl into a corner to be found, to be comforted and hugged, someone to tell us its all gonna be okay, someone who will continually tell you all these till you believe them, till you are convinced totally.

i can speak so much negativity in life that i've forgotten how to be happy again. i've heard so much negativity from myself and people around me that i've changed into someone who doesn't even know how to be happy.

Do you know what it's like to be happy?

Do you know what it's like to be able to smile and not be afraid of anything that would happen?

Have we left all these behind in the process of growing up or have we been too caught up in our chases for a better future that we forgot the importance of our present happiness?

I don't plan for a better future anymore, because my plans always diverge.

we all get tired. we all want to wait for people around us to pull us up, but they can't do this for us all the time. we've got to get strong on our own. we've got to explore the ends of each tunnel on our own at times. we've got to close ourselves up at times to learn to get strong and be a better person for us and those around us.

i've got to get stronger than i am now. that's the amount of strength i need.

june hasnt ended!

so i shall wait till june end then i blog about june hohoho!

but i want blog abt sri lanka trip first.

but im tired alrd!

so tomorrow! :D

#251

been on MIA for long enough to shoot myself. ):

what if i forgot what i did!

nah it wont happen. thanks to my schedule book. :D

you know, its june now and i haven even posted may's entry.

but because im kinda excited to blog about my recent trip to sri lanka, i shall skip many nothing really special days and only talk about funny exciting days! :D

04 May 2011

was really super sian after some stuffs over at night on 3rd of may i remember. and so decided to go out to clarke quay. and cos sis needed to study for her exams we went out tgther :D

we took bus 80 all the way there. then we started talking. and we were nearing clarke quay. so we were telling each other must look out for clarke quay.

2 pairs of eyes right? but we ended up at harbourfront interchange.

AWESOME OR WHAT.

we cfm 100% plus chop sisters cos our directions bad like *idontevenknwhowtodescribeitnowlol*

so anw we ended up at vivo's starbucks. then 2 chefs came to sit beside us. and really talked super loud. =.=

then my sis said that woman sit till super unglam. so they sat and talked till like forever.

my sis damn pissed cos she cant study and i sian cos i want read the book on sri lanka but if i read i cant hear music cos i cant concentrate cos that book is boring but if i dont listen to music i hear their voice i sian. -.- see what i mean.

annoying people who cannot talk at a lower volume. THEY NOT IN KITCHEN LA NO NEED SHOUT WALAO EH!

then we went to LJS for dinner and got homeeeee! (:

07 May 2011

met yj for CJ!

oh yay i got to eat my chao nian gao.

and kimchi pancake :D

then i forgot what we did.

but i think we went far east to get her colleague wedding present preordered.

I THINK LA.

omg i cant rmb haha!

then we went to hougang mall to buy cake and dinner then homedddd :D

09 May 2011

AHHHH AVRIL CONCERT

i dont know why she so awesome but she is awesome. :)

her vocals are super powerful.

and i like this album also.

she sang alot of songs.

AND ENCORED SOMEMORE!

omg she never does this!

and this is the first concert of hers i've been to.

prolly the last cos i think she might not come out with anymore concerts):

but its okay if she come back.

TOTALLY FINE WITH ME COS SHE SINGS SO WELL

and writes nice songs!

it was a mad rush the whole day cos in the morn i had driving till 10:10am then i rushed to work then i rushed down to stadium. wooohooo. (Y) but i wasnt tired. :D HAHA!

11 & 13 May 2011

Met LY for dinner! (:

had long chat on 11th and 13th for a short while at pasir ris then i went off to find sis and yj over at plaza sing! then the three of us ate at cafe cartel (no i didnt eat la ahah). after that we went off to walk around and finally went homeee! :D

14 May 2011

met the girls to collect grad outfit!

end up i didnt even rent cos i borrow from yijun LOL

then we went off to vivo for picnic! :D

had alot of fun there with the girls!

super long didnt meet up alrd.

18 May 2011

MET HAS FOR MACBETH!

apart from the fact that the sound system not that good, everything about the show is good.

haha! its cos i read the book before.

and awesome partner i brought along with me.

has got so annoyed with the people behind us she keep complaining about them.

LOL.

i forgot what they did.

but they were annoying.

HAHA!

21 May 2011

BBQ at my house! :D

Love the people who came.

cant be bothered with those who didnt come and made up excuses not to come.

cause i use such small things to determine how much i mean to you.

and if thats how much i meant, then this is how much you get from me.

and that night was important to me because i needed certain answers.

and your presence would mean alot to me.

so i thank all of you who came and know my story (:

even if you dont, but came, thank you too :) ♥

23 May 2011

Met wenyi, nicholas and youwei for Kbox today!

eh this wenyi very bad.

she ming ming know how to sing the song but she always tells me she dk how to sing

then end up i always have to solo sing one.

TELL ME WHY SHE SO BAD.

speaking of K i kinda miss K leh.

):

so long didnt sing.

HAHA im a liar i just sang in my room this afternoon.

LOL

-.- okay i shall stop being so lame.

at this point of time i cant stop hiccuping.

and this is annoying me.

@.@

25 May 2011

met ashley for dinner and long chat! :)

updated her alot of things that i didnt cos i didnt meet up with her haha!

had pepper lunch and then we went home after that (:

"HAVE TO REMEMBER TO TAKE VIDEOS FROM HER HAHA"

26 May 2011

Grad day today! (:

and bro's chi birthday tooo!

went to fish and co for dinner at NEX after grad ceremony (:

♥ all my lovelies ♥♥

28 May 2011

Bro's bday today!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! (:

went out for family dinner and then homed to cut cake! :D

i dont understand how on earth can this happen.

neither can i accept the fact that you allowed for this to happen and you ruined all of us.

all that could have been.

relationships

on a blogging roll now.

A friend once asked me this question.

"Would you rather be with the one you love or would you rather be with the one who loves you?"

We all know this is based on our own perceptions. Yet, i believe that the way we love another also shows who we are.

How sure are we that if we started a relationship with someone who loves us (but we do not love them), we would learn to give as much as we received at the start of the relationship? Although many arguments arise about the ending, I always believe that people who continually receive would continue receiving, maybe to an extent that we will one day take everything given to us for granted. There are two types of people in this world, those that give, and those that receive. There are grey areas within, but we all know we are more skewed to one side. As time goes by, the one giving is bound to get tired, and will not want to give anymore. You, on the other hand, have gotten used to the receiving. The sudden withdrawal by your partner is bound to leave you uncontented. Quarrels will follow and that's where the relationship is heading towards, downhill. Even the strongest love would waver if there is no return.

Being with the one you love is a choice. Its an arduous journey because you risk losing everything, including yourself. You would start circling your world around him/her. You face a much higher risk of being heartbroken because you opened your heart. In the game of love, you lose. But people like you tell yourself that between love and pride, you choose love. Because love is a beautiful thing. it gives you the strength to continue no matter how hard your life is. In the end, you are often the one who decides if this is what you really want, and when it is time to move on, you get up and move, stronger than how you were before the start of the relationship. More independent, more sure and certain of what you needed and wanted.

There's no such thing as unconditional love, because things would get to a point where you would want more than you have received. When expectations are not met, we get disappointed, and disappointments would slowly turn into dissatisfaction against the other.

Often, we would end up losing the one who loves us, and we regret as time goes by and we meet many others who never treat us as well. We want to turn back the clock, and reverse everything, but we all fail to realize that some things gone will never return. A heart once broken would not allow itself to be mended. pretty sad but true. as much as we hate to admit it, we hide into a shell that protects us so well, build walls to protect ourselves, only to hurt others in the process.

A relationship is a two way street. There's no room for a third party or all will be lost. Neither is there a way out because the only way out is a break up. If one party stops trying, the other would eventually stop too, because the amount of hurt and effort that one puts in is not enough to salvage a love that has been lost.

爱与被爱都是一种幸福的选择，只是看你选哪一个而已。

I ever watched a show, and i believe in this statement strongly.

“在爱情的过程里面，有一个人是一直站在付出比较多一点的那一方。所以受伤，嫉妒，开心，欢笑，所有爱情的感觉，我们都比对方多了一倍。当然伤害业会多了一倍。不过这些现在对方都感觉不到了，全部都留给我们承受。不过也正因为我们比别人多了一份爱，才有力量在伤痛中重新站起来。”

We should never take love given to us for granted, because the time will come one day where we will regret what we have not cherished.

#250

april now!

haha im such a procrastinator.

but im determined to blog down my life. :)

02 April 2011

HAPPY BIRTHDAY YULOON! (:

04 April 2011 - 12 April 2011

was away in taiwan with sis, yijun and wenning! (:

although we've never seen wenning before but very fast became shou with each other.

(MUST BE COS WENNING VERY FUNNY ALSO)

and i shall dedicate one blog post for taiwan :D

gosh idk when im going to get my lazy bones to do that.

taiwan's an awesome place. (:

oh and u can ask me for the itinerary of ours if you want (:

just email me! :D

12 April 2011

got back in singapore at like 12am plus plus.

slept for like i dk how long but then i went for ftt etrial test in the morning at like i think 10plus?

then there was a 45 min break and i was like dozing off here and there

the nervous nerves totally didnt get into my head

gosh i hate myself at times like this.

then i DOZED OFF DURING E TRIAL TEST.

sigh

getting old.

LOL.

AH WELL I PASSED SO THOSE LAMENTS ARE UNCALLED FOR (:

now left with practical lessons :D

13 April 2011

Sis and i met yijun to go CJ to pass them the stuffs we bought for them over at taiwan (:

(WEARESONICE)

Went to find anqi and zy at city hall for lunch at astons!

passed them their presents and anqi's posters (SEE SO NICE)

left there to go catch limitless over at the cathay!

limitless is a good show.

haha i like shows like this.

14 April 2011

walked home with wenyi from ubi after driving lessons!

ahh i love walks like this. :D

and we bought the 1dollar ice cream to eat otw home

((:

15 April 2011

went to kallang with mother so she can fry hei bi hiam.

HAHAHA

the smell was crazily overpowering i kept coughing in the house.

and then mother told me she was going to go for acupuncture and she told me i should go walk around somewhere.

POOR ME.

and so i went to find three of them over at suntec!

after that i went back to kallang to find mom.

okay i lied. i actually went to walk around and spent a bomb before going back to find mom.

hehh hehh.

and then i went for like a joy ride around here and there before finally going home to shower before going to BBQ :D

this reminds me, i have to book pit alrd! :D

EXCITED.

I LOVE to BBQ food HAHAHA!

i spent 2 hours in the bus.

im not joking.

omg i hate the jams. i sat till my whole back stiffen HAHAHA

wth im getting old.

the fire couldnt start and so we went to microwave the food so that people can eat the cooked food first :D

and then wenyi walked me to the bus stop :D

took less than an hour to get home.

(now you know why i love going home at the dead of the night. NO JAM)

16 April 2011

Met yijun for cycling today! :D

we cycled around sengkang estate before going back to her house to return her probably now broken bike.

headed over to jacks place for lunch before going home! :D

YAY I LOVE CYCLING :D

idc if im bad at it, at least i learn.

HAH!

17 April 2011

yay i cooked dinner today!

EVEN THOUGH its like not cooking cos all instant food.

and the worst thing is.

): i actually forgot to take pictures. actually no i did but only the sweet and sour pork picture was saved. ):

19 April 2011

yayness i cooked today again!

cooked bak kut teh leh:D

and i almost drove my mom nuts by telling her that i didnt want to cook instant food.

and so we went to buy the herbs before we went home to cook. :D

had to rush through the cooking because i had work at night!

tiring but never mind it was funnnnn ^^

20 April 2011

accompanied mom to SEAB to pay for sister's exam fees.

turns out SEAB was super near to clarke quay so mom alighted me down at one bus stop to take a bus down to clarke quay!

heh i went to starbucks to stare into space.

:D

i love starbucks.

LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE!

met zy later to go over to party world for k with jiayan!

super long didnt see jiayan alrd!

and then went home after that!

*love walking home from kovan at night.

21 April 2011

went for driving in the morning before going home to shower and then came out of the house to go work at night.

met zy before work cos just nice he end work early and needed to kill time

we went to eat auntie anne! :DDDD

i love auntie anneeeee HEHEHE

23 April 2011

Movie marathoned with yijun!

we caught Rio and and and Source Code!

AWESOME SHOWS

though rio is lighthearted, and for kids, but i learnt something from there.

If we never try, we wouldn't ever know what we are capable of.

*sorry brain abit dead i really no strength to talk about what i learnt from the movies.

yeah i know "what i do right, all i do is bum around everyday, only go out for wasting money ): but HEY! bumming around also need energy one!"

alright stop justifying my laziness):

and after that we went over to hougang to find joanne so that she can go dye her hair.

wow very bright color.

LOL.

and dad keeps asking me what i did at the salon.

HIII i didnt do anything.

i think he wants me to dye my hair too.

25 April 2011

Went to collect stuff with sis and mom in the afternoon.

then we went off to compass to get our lunch.

(time was like 3 plus luh ): )

and i bought famous amos cookies! :D

by the time i blog about this date, the cookies are alrd gone.

HAHAHA

love butterscotch cookies from famous amos! :D

26 April 2011

met zy for lunch before going off to find joanne at work!

and i ended up becoming her pao tui today

went to subway to buy her burger, then went to mac to buy her fries then went to cold storage to buy annie her 100 plus.

did i mention i bought her a drink from gong cha before going over to CJ?

tsktsktsk.

she waited for me after work and we homed tgther with ah wei and ah kang!

those two people really damn bully.

sighhhhh.

27 April 2011

met zy for lunch before (supposedly meeting joanne at somerset) going home.

she is a nugget. tell me she will meet me there but end up she lazy ):

and so i went off to work after lazing around at home. LOL

28 April 2011

yayyyy went for driving lessons and then came home to waste time abit before going off to meet wenyi at house bus stop!

walked to hock lam beef and then cos we were not hungry we ended up walking to heartland mall and stroll around before going back to hock lam beef for a very very very very filling dinner! :D

and the food was nice :D

yay i finally ate hock lam beef after... 1 year of craving!

HAHAHHA

29 April 2011

met zy for lunch at vivo and then after that went to find mom at farrer park! :D

end up go grocery shopping with her and went around here and there with her before going off to somerset alone to sit at starbucks over a nice cup of ice latte. :))

worked and came home with a fright thanks to sis.

but thank goodness its all over now. (:

30 April 2011

SUPPOSED to go cycling with wenyi in the morning but the weather really sucks.

end up want rain no rain dk got rain anot.

grrrrr.

then went off to find yijun to go CJ to have lunch! :D

yay i ate my chao nian gao.

happppy happppy day! :D

went off to fareast to er i really forgot.

HAHAHAH

i was joking!

end up yj only managed to get 1 thing on her list of things to be done completed.

"buy smth for her colleague's wedding."

tsktsk

YAYYYYNESS IM DONE WITH APRIL :)

PS i've got to learn how to spell itinerary - i googled the spelling. HAHHAA

tag replies only (:

Lepak: hi, sorry but i dont understand malay..

Sophia: No problem on that! (:

BLOGOBO: (:

Silvia: Haha welcome! (:

Mary: Hi, enlighten me on what's barter feature? Would love to try new things (:

Atiqah: cool! its for us to go read random entries? haha

#249

hoho it has been long!

last update was since i went to taiwan for grad trip and came back (:

ready for march? :D

06 March 2011

lunched with family at Jumbo tgther with grandaunt!

haha i can't remember what else we did but it was family day! :D

07 March 2011

ASHLEY's BIRTHDAY TDY! (:

Went for interview with Yijun over at tampines in the afternoon before going off to do ashley's birthday cake. Hehe. last minute decision but it was super nerve breaking to do that cake. (from here i can see that i wont make it as a baker so very sadly) and then off to find ashley over at amk for dinner at fish and co! :D and after that we went to K at broadway plaza there hehe. homed after that (:

08 March 2011

gosh had another 2 sessions of driving today. instructor is nice but strict too i rmb, but i learn alot under him. (but i shall not really talk about driving cos i always feel so silly after each lesson ): )

09 March 2011

Went for ICA job thingy with Anqi tdy! It's super fun! i remember how anqi was crazily searching the boot of the car. (she has potential to work at the chop passport place) HAHA. met yijun for dinner at happy chef :D hehehe i love happy chef! :D :D :D

14 March 2011

Met Yuloon Mummy today at Novena! :D had lunch tgther before walking around everywhere in novena square. hoho. left at 4 plus later to go buy stuffs at china town before meeting mom at compass point for i forgot what but i know i went there. HAHA. oh and i walked all the way from outram park to clarke quay to take train! yes i know its a straight line but people might also get lost and tired and give up along the way right! so its justified as an accomplishment! Hhohoho.

15 March 2011

Met LY and wenyi for cycling at east coast park! (learnt cycling tdy) WEEEE ACHIEVEMENT LIKE ANYTHING) i took like 1 hour plus i think, and steering have problem (okay fine my steering always have problem. i shall face up to it bravely) AND I DIDNT FALL! :D OMG SO HAPPPPPPPI. (please let me be happy while i can okay thankyou) and met ashley and leonard for dinner at watami@bishan! :D and so paisei cos leonard paid for the meal! but the food was niceeeeeee :D :D

17 March 2011

Met yijun and zhengyao for movie tdy! watched the red riding hood, its a not bad movie, with a real special twist towards the end. Pretty cool! and then we went walking around to orchard central and sat at coffee bean to talk. hoho. and and and then we went to art friend to take a look. :D went for dinner thereafter before going home! :D

20 March 2011

MOM's birthday today!

went for dinner at raffles town club with family

(photos with sister)

shall update with photos once i get it:D

21 March 2011

Met yijun and zhengyao to celebrate zy's birthday!

we went to K at clarke quay's party world and played Happy birthday song.

but the happy birthday song was super epic and haha we ended up singing the song ourselves.

and we gave him a scardy cat lion. its a scardy cat lion cos i said so. went off to have dinner at marina square to spend the marina square vouchers after that (: hoho, and feeling very very full after that, we went home! :D

22 March 2011

worked full day today cos night plans was cancelled in the end and sis needed to find replacement for the night ):

23 March 2011

ZHENGYAO's BIRTHDAY TODAY!

and seriously, my planner wrote nothing else. i cant remember what i did. ):

25 March 2011

Met yijun for cycling and then lunch at BBQ chicken! :D then we went to watch sucker punch. i honestly feel there is something more to this show but i just can't figure it out. There's got to be something lehhh! homed after that after buying dinner for brother.

"And so, the movie started off with the death of a very rich mom of two girls. She left behind everything to her daughters, much to the (i would say evil) stepfather's anger. He attempted to rape the protagonist one day, but failed. and when it failed, he locked the protagonist in her room and turned to her younger sister and tried to rape her. the sister ran to hide in the closet, and while he was trying to unlock the door, the protagonist got out of her room by jumping out of the window and grabbing a gun, and attempted to shoot him. With a miss, what she found was her sister, breathless. he took this opportunity to send her to the home for the mentally insane, where she struggled to get out with a plan. Together with the rest, they attempted to get out. A wise man in her fantasies told her that they needed to obtain 5 things to get out. A map, fire, knife, key, and the fifth thing was a mystery that only the protagonist could discover herself. A clue was that it required a sacrifice. Obtaining the first four items was a drift between reality and imagination. Sacrifices were made in between obtaining the items, and eventually, what was left was the protagonist and another girl. The last item, as deduced by the protagonist, was her herself. She needed to be sacrificed in order to complete the other girl's story. The story then goes on to the part where the protagonist just finished her lobotomy, and reveals that the psychiatrist have never agreed to this lobotomy. Her stepfather bribed someone to forge the signature. Police is brought in and the next scene shows the girl who escaped getting on the bus. the bus driver helps her on when she was stopped by police officers who found her suspicious. she has no documents and would have been caught without the help of the driver. It turns out that the driver is the same man who appeared in the fantasy of the protagonist. He tells her that she still has a long journey ahead, and the story ends with the bus driving off."

What i think is that this movie teaches you something about life. from the time where she got inside the mentally insane institute, she was observing every single thing. Right from the start she was plotting her escape. And she did it, she could have escaped successfully. She chose to give up her chances of escaping to another who needed it more. She was happy to be lobotomized probably because she rather she forgot everything. The other girl still had a long way to go after escaping, and the experience she had in the mental institute was enough to wide her up for the long journey.

26 March 2011

DADDY's BIRTHDAY!

oh gosh. i can't remember what the heck i did today.

but i bet it was family day. HAHAHA

28 March 2011

Met LY, Yijun and zhengyao for kbox today!

HEHE

and after that went to have astons for dinner over at city square mall! :D

you shall hear how i get so afraid of astons. hahahha

29 March 2011

met anqi for lunch at ASTONS cos i was so bored at home and she was finding someone to accompany her for lunch :D

and then went off to marina square to spend the last of my vouchers on Lincoln Lawyer with zy!

the exchange of words between the people in the show was awesome. (spoilers ahead)

"Its all about this lawyer (Mick Haller) who is really good at defending his clients. His office is at the back of his chauffeured Lincoln car. He got his break with this friend of his who claimed the help of his trustworthy friend who searches for information about the case from various sources. After obtaining the case file from the police through his friend, Mick notices an uncanny resemblance between this and a case that he had fought for years back. He seeks his friend's help again, and when his friend had some leads to what he was looking for, he receives a call; his friend died. The bullet came from a gun that he had kept at home, an collectors' item, and he was suspected for murder. While his client continued insisting on his innocence, Mike grew increasingly suspicious of him. His client always left a loophole which Mike Haller would uncover after each investigation. He started to search for the truth himself to avenge his friend and to win the case for his client. He eventually finds out the truth, but still wins the case for his client, as he would professionally. The twist comes when his client is arrested again just after the case, for another offence. When he realizes that the client was released due to lack of evidence to charge him, Mike goes on a rush against time to protect his wife and daughter. The story eventually ended with a twist that the actual murderer of his friend was his client's mother."

great film, and i love how it boggles my mind somehow. More than anything else, i get the thinking from this movie that we should always stay clear to our conscience.

okay and then we started wasting time away till i was supposed to meet the girls to celebrate wenyi's bday! :D (belated haha) and guess what we had!

YES RIGHT.

ASTONS.

omg. by now i was so afriad of eating chicken that i ordered fish hahahaha.

and wenyi's bday cake was A BUNCH OF BANANAS WTH HAHAHHA

SO DUPER FUNNY.

31 March 2011

Met Has for breakfast at hougang mall! :D

Super random, and then we sat over there at Macs complaining and complaining about life and everything.

AND SHE FINALLY FOUND A JOB ahahhaha

homed to dk help mom do what.

hehhh

*there'll be an edit on this post. i still have another movie review to do! :D*

#248

i'm actually lazy to get my scheduler from my grandma to find out what i did over the past few days/weeks/month.

and so i shall just blog randomly because i really need to blog or i will really get mad.

not that i would explain why i am going mad. (:

i notice i love to talk about life whenever i am not feeling very happy.

shall just be random and talk about avril's latest album. when i heard what the hell and read the comments about her at youtube i was very sad. because she is the first female singer that i ever liked listening to. i'm never a listen to rock person but i just like avril's songs. and so, imagine my happiness when i heard her new album. (: it's just as awesome. and somehow, idk if its me, i feel her songs mellowed already, and you can sort of see her growing up with her albums? okay maybe its just me. seriously, her album is awesome. i love everybody hurts, i love you, stop standing there, wish you were here, (im like listing out the whole album alrd) haha

another random thought. i should start packing my table because it's messy and i cant even find my EZ link card. i'm so lazy lately i really just wanna sleep the whole day away. i used to think that sleeping is a waste of time but now i am sleeping almost the whole day. ):

oh i've finally learnt cycling. im so happy i've never been so happy my life. i wish i could stay by the beach in future so i will get to smell the air of the sea every single day when i wake up. no i'm not crazy. somehow i just love this very serene feeling.

oh and i would be going to sri lanka some where in june/july? shall go there to 'find' myself. stay in the mountains and meditate my whole week or two away there. honestly i cant wait. yeah i'm going on again with that finding myself part. i am always finding myself. i always say i want to find myself but i get lost again and again. im really going to isolate myself in the mountains this time and see what i get from it.

oh and i've really got to start preparing for my FTT. because i'm gonna have no time.

AND I SHOULD START CONTINUING ON MY TW TRIP PLANNING. because time is running out and i am still on day 4? ):

okay i shall come back to blog after all these! :D :D

MY MOTIVATION!

#247

sometimes i really think that my dog thinks that i'm mad or smth. or really weird.

idk im so random. i just suddenly thought of this sentence. but then now when i think about it i have totally nothing to substantiate my statement.

is this a good or bad thing?

okay i'll think of smth.

i'll crack my brains to think of smth.

okay here's the something.

1. i talk gibberish to my dog just so that she will dk what the hell i am saying (seriously i wonder if she actl EVER understands anything besides the usual commands*) and then she will tilt her head.

* commands include mum mum(food!), kai kai (walk walk), sit, por por (carry) = SO LIMITED. oh and she actl selectively decides if she wanna "hear" your commands

2. owners don't like their dogs on their beds right? at least my dad doesn't like it. i always carry my dog to my bed after she had a bath and then i'll play with her there and 'lock' her till i leave the room. and she doesn't like the bed either. but she doesn't like the sofa too. she only likes the red chair which is now a big big cushion only. OH and that brings me to her knowing another 2 commands (red chair and blue chair). she loves sitting on these two chairs (red one more) and whenever i say the word she will get up so very excitedly.

3. i like to tell her to come here, and then play with her a bit and tell her to go away, and when she goes away i'll ask her where are you going? come back! 99 out of 100 times she really does go away and does not turn back. maybe cos she thinks i'm just gonna do it again. but hey! i'll justify my madness by saying that its cos i'm trying to help her exercise by walking more steps!

4. i love to irritate my dog. and when i irritate her and she barks or growls at me, i'll scold her. i'll be like you dare to growl/bark at me! and then i bet she's like confused cos i'm actl the one at fault. i'm not sadistic okay. i just have to stand behind her and pretend i wanna disturb her by touching the ground near her and she'll bark already. she is one cranky old dog. but don't you think its funny. hahaha

5. because i say so. i dont want to leave it at number 4. so i have to think of a 5. i just think she thinks that i'm weird and crazy.

okay i'm really weird. ):

Totally Random

shall reply tags before anything!

Aaron: did i reply you before? anw it's super updated alrd. LO
Saly: Thank you (:
Kamalia: thanks! but i'm curious, what's the attraction? (:
Claudia: haha thanks! (:
Fina: its a forum?

i wanna talk about the books i've read before! (at least those that i can remember)

Bestest Author of all (at least the one i like): Cecelia Ahern

Books under her name (which i have), [bolded those that i've read]: The Book Of Tomorrow, The Gift, Thanks For The Memories, A Place Called Here, If You Could See Me Now, Where Rainbows End, P.S I Love You

Her new book's coming out. (yes basically i collect all her books.) not the short stories though. idk why haha.

P.S I Love You is one of the most heart wrenching books I've come across. If my memory still works well, its chapter 23, the chapter where her husband was already about to die, but went to the travel agency to book a holiday for his wife to go for after his death touched me the most. I'm not joking when I say that this book really makes you feel like you do want to love someone, and that true love really lasts. Holly goes through her life after the death of Gerry with no direction at all, till she receives a set of letters by Gerry as promised. The story mainly revolves around "The List" and how it manages to help Holly get through life after her husband's death. From the excitement of the minute of each midnight of the 1st of the month, to slowly faded away It mentions 10 things for her to do in 10 months, both little and big. This list brings her through her loss and teaches her the lesson in the sweetest way that time heals all pain, and things get easier as time passes by. Honestly, it really awed me. All the 10 things can seem minute but have such great underlying meanings.

Where Rainbows End is a more light hearted book. Another name for it is Love, Rosie. This story is about two friends, Alex and Rosie, who grew up together since young. They go through their lives in separate worlds as Alex had to move, but made a pact (and kept to it) to continue communicating (via email most of the time). Both have their own families at different points of their lives, are always on different paces therefore always missing out on the opportunities, but find themselves to each other 5o years later. It's just like telling you that if you two are meant to be, nothing can stop you, even if it takes 50 years. And they experienced this silence, this really golden silence which i always feel is magical. "Looking at each other and the whole world just seems to stop. There's suddenly not a single sound, not even the singing of the birds or the wind blowing. It's just the both of them."

If You Could See Me Now is about imaginary friends. The main reason why i can relate to the character is because we both have the same name. Oh yeah maybe i can include the part where we both leave little room for error. Ivan teaches Elizabeth how live should be lived, instead of being in control all the time. She begins to trust him, get over her life issues, and just when everything seems to be falling into place, she realizes that he isn't who she thought he was. This book is cute yet really touching at various parts of the book. I remember how Ivan was told he was not allowed to stay with Elizabeth due to specific reasons, and how broken hearted he was. He actually loved her before she could even see him, before they even talked. And so they eventually went separate ways, and Elizabeth learnt how to relax while Ivan continues to hold on to this very special relationship they once had.

The Book of Tomorrow is a really great book to me. Mostly because it's so timely. Tamara has everything that anyone can have, but she is hardly ever satisfied with it, until one day, when she loses everything suddenly and is forced to give up her lavish lifestyle. While struggling to cope with these painful changes that happened suddenly, Tamara chances upon a diary which magically fills itself up with the following day's events. And it comes to a point of time when she realizes that she can take her chances and change her future. The story unfolds really naturally, with the unexpected events surprisingly linking up together to finally unravel a greatest secret about her parentage, and her mother's past. She learns as she goes through the hard knocks in life by making mistakes, both big and small, and finally grows up with this knowledge that you have to bear the consequences for your actions.

And these are the other random reads I can think of at the moment (maybe cos i just read them awhile ago)

Perks of Being a Wallflower. A great book actually. This writer is awesome because his writing style is so... different. This story spans around a boy called Charlie, who can well be anybody. He writes to this person whom he feels is a good listener and in the letters to this person, he writes about the many things that he go through, including his love, his mistakes, and his depression. And i wont forget how this girl he really loves told him that

"Charlie, don't you get it? I can't feel that. It's sweet and everything, but it's like you're not even there sometimes. It's great that you can listen and be a shoulder to someone, but what about when someone doesn't need a shoulder. What if they need the arms or something like that? You can't just sit there and put everybody's lives ahead of yours and think that counts as love. You just can't. You have to do things."

“Like take their hands when the slow song comes up for a change. Or be the one who asks someone for a date. Or tell people what you need. Or what you want. Like on the dance floor, did you want to kiss me?"

This book left me kind of depressed for a little while because of the things that he faced. His posts are passively negative and somehow the negative energy can be passed to you. But you learn abit of something here and there whenever this happens. so i guess its good in a way?

What Alice Forgot mainly teaches you to slow down and relook your lives. Alice lost ten years of her memory and within 10 years, she find herself today going through a divorce with the husband she loved so much, and 3 kids whom she feels she can never control. The book continues through for a large part of the story where she tries to bring her life back into what it was. And i always remember how Nick (her husband) told her that he would know when she regains her memory. She would look at him different. And she really did, he recognized it instantly, when she regained his memory. But could 10 years really change you and your love? Or should you remember to always slow down and spend more time with each other? A marriage falls apart for a very simple reason. both parties stopped trying.

The Notebook has a predictable ending and can be easily followed. i literally finished this book in a day despite the ending. You just want to flip page after page. The story is really heartbreaking and we see another totally devoted man who gives his all to the woman he loves, and this woman, who is willing to give up her riches and stability in life for a man she loves, and finally overcoming what people would call impossible/a miracle.

Cleo The main thing that attracted me to the book was the cover, because of the Blackie. In many ways, they were similar. The same type of energy level, the same type of healing spirit. Cleo was a cat, a black cat that helped in healing a family after the death of someone close. The writing style makes the read a light hearted one though there are instances of my heart wrenching up and my tears falling. Her descriptions of each event are so vivid that i can imagine them in my head and laugh at the comical occasions. Cleo answered me many questions that i had in my mind then. It again teaches you how to cope with loss, a different sort of loss, while dealing with life and the many problems that it brings with.

#246

It's the end of exams!

*WOOHOOOOOO*

and this means i have graduated (if i didn't fail any modules)

OMT don't make me fail idw to go back study for another half a year and waste my time and hai my GPA. ):

and anyway, after the dreaded exams...

02 Mar 2011

finished LM paper with a very mixed up feeling.

(cos what came out was hardly taught in lectures. its like use ur brain and common sense which really make me think my answers are wrong because... yes sadly, i have no common sense): )

and then yj and i went to cheers to buy papers and then crashed the lib room (for the last time ever) to....

look for jobs.

eh seriously, i really wonder how do people find jobs.

The moment i open and look at the Straits Times page i'm like

"Omg, I'm giddy already."

The television shows make finding jobs so fun and easy.

okay and then yijun started TRYING to convert me to watch gossip girls.

wouldn't say its a bad show but sorry i'm too lazy to load shows.

i take a year to watch a 13 episode thing on youtube. LOL.

and we went for xlb buffet at holland after that.

They had the tiniest mantou ever. we are like super amazed at the size of it. LOL.

people have bite sized cornetto, they have bite sized mantou.

anw we were lousy la, ):

and thanks yijun for the treat (zhuai yi xia)

03 Mar 2011

i think it's gonna be hard to forget this day EVER.

anyway it was my first practical lesson ever.

applied for my pdl and went for the lesson.

OH THANK GOD THE INSTRUCTOR WAS SO KIND AND PATIENT.

although i think he must think i'm really dumb for stalling his car for like 2352462123 times.

):

i'll never forget how i just step on the accelerator abit and the car was like vrrommmm.

omg my heart race with it.

hahaha!

and my heartbeat just keep pumping very very fast even after 10 minutes have passed.

why is it so exciting to drive ah.

HAHA!

went for FTT e-trial test after that (2 hrs later)

so yeap. i only studied for my FTT for 2 hours, and fell asleep while studying.

and i did 3 tests out of 5. (passed 2 only)

so means i shld buck up.

cos i really no time after coming back from tw.

04 Mar 2011

Met huda to pass her the report, then yijun joined us after that.

we clowned around in the lib, LOL.

*children section* LAUGHS.

and the we went to have lunch tgther afterwards.

and went to PS to see daiso and get the stuffs.

did ashley's card and box (:

before doing more housework ):

*see the emotional upheaval*

05 Mar 2011

HEY THTS TODAY!

had lunch with mom and bro and sis before heading off to ashley's house to celebrate her bday.

PLAYED monopoly deal while waiting for the rest.

oh i super huai nian this game sia.

her sec sch clique really very funny i tell you.

LOL.

then we were playing this game like snap but can be played by alot of people.

its so qi ji.

LOL!

anw just kept laughing at alot of things. even if its not funny. LOL.

but i think at 7 plus i start to seh and stone alrd.

like all the energy sapped alrd.

then we cut cake at 8 plus and headed home at 9 plus!

#245

READY FOR FEB?

:D

i decided to skip the talkings about school presentations because they are not fun.

and so.

03 Feb 2011

MET COUSIN TODAY! (:

like meet once and she is gonna go back to aussie again ):

and though majority of the shops were closed, we still ventured around.

we went to BK to chat and then went to cold storage to walk around then went to watsons then went to really just walk around aimlessly. i love days like this. just waste the day away with people you love, walk around aimlessly and talk abt really just anything that comes into your mind.

04 Feb 2011

was really rotting at home till i think i would really rot. and then practically woke up when i was told we cant meet at marina sq. and so i finally breathed the fresh air after cooping myself at home TRYING HARD to do my report. starbucks with anqi and zhengyao and then we started walking ard to here and there before finally going home! and i started to face reality of projects again after going home. LOL

08 Feb 2011

Jap youth forum! okay this one must say. cos my group came in second during the competition even though our jap all . . . . . HAHAHA and we had this royce biscuit as prize which i think is niceeee! :D (oh and i think those japanese are cute and shuai. HAHAH!)

09 Feb 2011

TAYLOR SWIFT CONCERT! aww my first paid concert! with haslinda :D weeee taylor swift's awesome! and she sang quite alot of those songs which i liked, like enchanted, sparks fly, speak now, back to december, mine, etc! :D and yeah we were one of those bad audience who went to the railings to take a closer look. LOL! and made a new friend from melbourne who came from aussie to see her concert. AWESOME. and haslinda kept going to the toilet again and again cos she was so nervous! HAHA

11 Feb 2011

went to study alone at toa payoh's coffee bean before meeting the rest at night. actl nice ambiance there. :D KBox at Balestier with anqi, yijun, zhengyao and his friend. oh no that name was just on the tip of my brain. oh gosh i hate my memory. and so after singing (they cut off the song automatically one ): ) we went off to eat tauhuay! then we started to go home. we were epic and lost our way. LOL. and something epic while we were waiting for cab. we were waiting for cab also because something epic happened. so it was an epic night overall. LOL. yeah yeah. some white shirt guy stole our cab. (in front of our very own eyes) seriously do these people still exist? take away the mws incident. cos they went opposite to take the cab so they are still nice (: yeah im biased. IDC!

14 Feb 2011

went to school to take final test for CCM. okay CCM is down im so glad. :D then went to jurong point's starbucks to wait for A.DLH! and someone late luh. and i can see how those people stop people and laughing at those couples who were holding bears. omg they are so mean. then ate at kopitiam after tht because wendys was too crowded! HOMEEEEEEEEEED!

16 & 17 Feb 2011

Etrial test and BTT! okay i passed. but it was really easy i realized. like i jing zhang for nothing. stupid me. but i know FTT's gonna be diff ):

18 Feb 2011

went to study at novena's starbucks in the afternoon cos there was a dinner there at night. i like that place. and i finished a book there. i mean storybook. LOL. its that nice to do things that u like. HAHA! gosh my lao ma make me angry can. late for like one hour 20 min and when i call to ask nicely where were they she was like dont ask me stupid qns can. grrrr. with my temper, i would alrd have been omw home if its my friend! oh and dinner was not very . . . nice. HAHA

19 Feb 2011

overnight study at cathay's starbucks after watching no strings attached with yijun! actually i like tht movie. idk how come i can sort of relate to the female lead's thinking. and i like one statement by the guy

"If you miss me. you can’t text, you can’t email, you can’t post it on my Facebook wall. If you really miss me, you come and see me.”

This guy has got the whole essence there in this sentence.

21 Feb 2011

overnight study with wenyi at mac! and there was this realization i made but up till tdy still cant rmb. okay i vaguely remember saying this but i'll say this again. "i hate my memory" ): and there was this table of guys who cmi after 5am and zao. one was frm NP. LOL. (we win :D) bought breakfast for family and slept till ten before studying againnnnnn

25 Feb 2011

BURNS IF (:

oh and i spend like majority of my weekends at liang court with yijun doing proj/studying haha!

#244

i'll just do everything except prepare for my exams.

):

i should stop procrastinating!

okay update! :D

it's been so long since i updated that i know there's gonna be lots of updating to do.

LOL.

thank god i have a planner/scheduler to keep my life in check.

who invented it? really a genius. cfm a market cos people like me forget their plans.

i'm looking out for really brave things to do in 2011.

milestone kind of thing. :D

31 Dec 2010

Met ashley to study tgther!

successfully finished my jap homework while she was revising her korean.

Mac is really conducive at clarke quay!

Met yijun, then LY, then Amanda, then Audrey, then Zhengyao for dinner at Central!

aww man, watami was full! ):

their food's really good.

then they exchanged presents and tadah!

we went off to walk around and check out helipad.

ended up choosing to sit by the river.

THEN LAST MIN MOVE TO JOIN THE BIG CROWD.

01 Jan 2011

spent the last few minutes of 2010 and first few minutes of 2011 with the girls.

i like clarke quay better when it's all quiet because it's so relaxing.

homed after that to sleep.

Went to K with yijun in the morning till like 6pm.

then went to walk around i think before going homeeee.

02 Jan 2011

i think we started this day by studying/chionging projects. why my planner didnt state. LOL i'm so dependent on my planner. and on the 03 Jan, School reopen. so its been a bore. JOKING. because school is hectic the moment it opened. ):

and so nothing exactly exciting happened, except

08 Jan 2011

Went Kbox with wenyi, youwei and his friend nicholas! i think all four of us are so funny. cos we are sick and can barely talk (don't say sing) but we still meet to sing cos i think paisei to back out like last minute. HAHA.

now that i check my planner, i realize i haven't been working since 13 Jan. (means no extra income, means bank a/c depreciate, means i'm unhappy ): )

19 Jan and 26 Jan 2011

Jap final test and speaking test. im gonna graduate with a diploma plus which i dont think i would mention about. oh i hate myself. LOL

22 Jan 2011

went for NTU talk but then somehow in the end. we ended up at marina square's Kbox after lunch at hans. why are we always doing this sort of epic things uh, yijun and zhengyao. okay nvm, the talk was boring. HAHA. headed to somerset after that to pass weifei the uni stuffs. i realize i am very good at psychoing. but i always psycho people and end up taking another route. ALWAYS. then went to audry's event at scape and bought badges, which we... (talk abt this later)

23 Jan 2011

went for LY's event at scape. toured around orchard and then ended up buying takeaway at swensens. Caught Burlesque after that, and homed after dinner! (think burlesque is a nice show btw)

29 Jan 2011

Finally went to walk ard in NEX after K-ing at Hougang Mall's Kbox. First time i went for Klunch. (didnt know it existed haha) and SUJU is breathing same air as us. (quote ashley) and then supposed to chomp chomp but smth happened and i had to go off~~

30 Jan 2011

NEX again! with fam. we went to have CJ xiao chu! :D eh the food's nice. though i think the price is abit... im so hooked up on the buy a watch thing. I TELL U ALL THE WATCH I LIKE!

okay la look smth like this. but like not exactly the same. cos the one i like has a small clockwork at the lower part of the watch. that moves! the second hand. omg i like. HAHA. but no its out of budget. see only la huh. OH I FOUND IT. its here!

okay and that marks the end of Jan (:

*relook your life.

#243

i want to talk about life.

Are you one of those people who meet with setbacks and think of giving up everything?

everything includes life.

After having gone through so many happenings last year,

I realized that nothing is going to ever be strong enough to put you down, except yourself.

It boils down to your thinking.

If you choose to self-despair, and choose to not be able to stand up after you fall, even if there are a hundred of psychologists out there, none of them can help you.

Why?

Because you already made up your mind.

It's simple.

I know sometimes the matters that we are faced with might be overwhelming, we might not be able to face it right away,

we might hide.

we might push it aside.

but it's not a long term solution,

because something would happen to trigger off the tears again.

but it's perfectly alright to push it aside till you can find a solution.

I do it all the time.

What is really important is that you must be able to face up to your emotions each time.

You think anyone really cares if you died today?

yeah they will, but what's the use then?

you ended every suffering for yourself.

but you passed them all onto those people who cared for you.

There are people out there,

fighting for their dear life.

people who really live life like there is no tomorrow.

Fact is,

we could all do this.

All we've gotta do is be contented.

It's really a simple concept.

But people seem to always do things the complicated way.

I think we should all slow down and relook our own lives.

i've always believed that you reap what you sowed.

that's logical right?

if you're nice, people would treat you nice.

if you're mean, people would treat you mean too.

this is still logical, and still applies... only to theory.

i don't think i'm a mean person.
neither do i think i have been fake or too self centered.

so why am i being dealt with this?

that's right.

i am hardly able to sympathize with anyone anymore.

don't even try comparing me with those unfortunate people in the third world countries because i'm not there. i don't know them. they don't know me either. but the difference? they have the worldwide coverage, i don't. you think people would give a damn about what is going on in my life now? yes, only those few.

and it's only those few who would be there.

the rest of you? go think about it yourself.

i'm done with giving a damn about you people because you don't really care about me.

since you hardly bother to be there, don't expect me to give anything to you anymore.

i'm tired enough trying to mend my own heart.

i can't be bothered with you anymore.

in Oct, i found out something that changed my life 360 degrees.

i'm not exaggerating.

in the same month, before i even had the chance to take a breather,

my grandpa and grandma were in and out of the hospital one after another.

my brother went into the hospital too.

grandpa had a bad fall and needed stitches on his head.

he was diagnosed with tongue cancer there.

grandma had samonella poisoning.

brother fell down while on bike and broke his ankle.

and then he is diagnosed with some form of disorder there.

when grandpa could be discharged, grandma was discharged.

when grandma was discharged, grandpa was admitted again.

for almost 2 months, i had to go through this.

and my other grandma was diagnosed with lung cancer.

before i had a chance to take a break from all these in the month of december,

i had a fall a week back.

my knees have been injured and has got worse from the constant kneeling every night.

my parents only found out about it a few days later.

i sprained my ankle.

my parents never knew it.

my grandparents passed away.

one after another,

in two days.

grandma passed away on fri night.

grandpa passed away on sun morning.

i cry almost every day, but so what?

i'm so bitter with life now.

today is the day of cremation of grandma, and i am not allowed to send her off because you are not allowed to go to two funerals.

that's right.

try being me.

#241

Aaron: HAHA there! updated!

ONE MONTH OF NO BLOGGING.

oh man.

i survived it. HAHA

finally common tests are over!

*pops champagne*

actually its maddening when i try to blog now cos i can't rmb what i did alrd ):

20 November 2010

yay! brought the japanese interns ard Bugis today

haha i feel so suaku bringing them around because i am exploring as I bring them around.

we had to use google maps to locate arab street and i saw haji lane!

wah i feel v accomplished :D

COS FOR ONCE IM THE ONE LEADING THE WAY!!!

hahahhahaahahahah.

okay whatever, i'm not going to listen to anyone who suans me.

22 November 2010

went to find ashley at NTU to study cos i have e learning week

and while studying we were muching on food.

:D

i like NTU.

nono i love NTU

LOL!

it's so freaking big that i think i would get lost even after studying there for like 10 years.

24 November 2010

i went to bishan lib today.

very moody.

really miss the peace.

25 November 2010

went PC fair with sis!

and then we went to find yijun at work for lunch cos her workplace is near expo.

(im so niceeeeeeeeeee)

then i went to promenade with sis cos she need go work.

from there i went home! :D

(haha and my sister felt like the older of both of us, cos she told me to call her if i lost my way)

*TOUCHED!*

dinner with dad and mom at some buffet restaurant.

the food is v nice! :D

but its an exp place. hoho

26 November 2010

with a very happy stomach and feeling, i went for my bcomm interview

HAHA.

oh but it was crazy.

i was mad nervous.

HAHA

str after the interview, when the teacher told me to sit beside her so she could go thru my stuffs,

MY FACE TURNED RED.

oh gosh.

i bet she thinks i'm hilarious.

LOL.

homed after that! :D

27 November 2010

went all the way to dover with yijun for LY's event

took photos and Polaroid there!

bought alot of stuffs and drinks.

(yet to upload oops)

i'll do everything by latest tmr.

PROMISE!

:D

and then went to PC fair to get my netbook and sis's camera.

my moolahhh.

okay let it fly away.

AND THERE WAS A FLEA MARKET THERE.

omgoodness.

they sold the card that i think is damn nice and cool and lalalallalala (Y) la!

LOL

then we cabbed to

02 December 2010

LY's birthday today!

i'm a professional liar i think.

she believed me like totally.

haha when i think back at those lies.

i dk how i thought of them gosh.

05 December 2010

stand chart marathon as volunteer!

im gonna join as participant next time,

and have people serving me water.

LOL!

we went to report at 1 am.

collect our stuff and all alrd,

then waited ard and slacked till 4 plus am 5?

LOL

then busy awhile jiu pack up alrd.

WE ENDED AT LIKE 8AM LA.

but logistics caused us to only end at 10.

and then i went home,

shower,

and study my JLPT.

no its really cui.

i was damn cui when i went for my test at 2 plus.

I DOZED OFF WHILE DOING MY TEST.

that's how epic i was.

so tired):

and when i got home i started to do my CCM individual assignment

im going mad.

LOL.

11 December 2010

had LM common test

and for some reason i was zi highing at the bus stop.

LOL

went to find yijun after my common test

went to her hse and ATTEMPTED to study for IF while she baked cookies.

hahaha its damn funnnnny!

12 December 2010

clarke quay to study!

(L) liang court!

and i went to buy a pudding to eat.

yummmmmmy

but i still like cup walker's best.

:D

13 December 2010

IF common test today!

i felt v not prepared ):

went to sign up for driving str after that.

ahhh its so scary going there alone.

I FEEL SO BRAVE

its the bravest thing i have/will do in 2010.

LOL.

blood donation is #1 on my list for 2011's must do!

I SHALL OVERCOME MY FEAR OF NEEDLES TO SAVE THREE LIVES.

went to find girls at far east.

oh gosh.

someone please invent a microchip that is preinstalled with maps to insert into brains

i'll buy it.

LOL.

i walked to taka and realized i am walking in wrong direction and walk back.

so i didnt eat dinner cos i arrived late.

(overslept)

OH GOSH I HAVE TO START SLEEPING MY DAYS AWAYYYY

#240

Xiaopei: who are you ah. impersonator!
Aaron: i think the songs are nice can! what noisy!

shit lah i keep listening to taylor swift's songs.

not that its bad, but on repeat!?

and this singer from thailand called sabrina is not bad too.

i want blog blog blog!

got the feel come back alrd.

hahaha!

13 November 2010

movie marathon with mad people!

due date with yj and zy

then we went to find ly and yt cos unstoppable starts at 7plus.

(FIRST TIME I GO IMM)

and while we were waiting for free shuttle bus there,

we saw a bus catered for a wedding one.

WAH DAMN COOL CAN.

but why bus.

LOL.

whatever, its not my wedding anw.

hahaha!

unstoppable with ly and yj

the movies were nice leh.

i liked due date cos it was super hilarious!

and i liked unstoppable cos the whole movie was thrill after thrill.

homed!

14 November 2010

chinatownnn todayyyy

WEEEEE~~

supposed to look for those travel agencies to find out more about Taiwan.

the stores were closed.

LOL

so we just walked around some weird place.

but i like that place.

HAHA!

i like CHINATOWN.

then we went to eat the nice nice nice porridge near outram park station.

super nice.

:D

i want go eat porridge again hahaha!

15 November 2010

school end then homed.

LOL

16 November 2010

school ended at only 6pm!

omgod.

then i went to Jurong Point to find ashley!

we ate budget food at the kopitiam and walked aimlessly as usual.

cos we talk rubbish while walking.

HAHHA

jurong point alrd has christmas decorations le!

jurong point is so big.

we try so hard to find the ATM but we couldn't find it.

in the end.

its at FAIRPRICE.

walao.

epic.

we alrd gave up finding then it appeared.

hahaha!

17 November 2010

heh heh.

WO MEN TODAY GO EAT CJ BUFFET!

ahhhhhhhhh i super xiang nian my kimchi pancake

and and and all the food that i miss.

LOL.

i swear im not gg to sit outside if we ever go there and eat again.

so unfair.

everyone's gonna think that im the one that eats all the nan gua bing!

when its that yj and zy who is the one eating all the nan gua bing.

(yj i fair to you okay.)

ZY EAT THE MOST NAN GUA BING!

and eat very silently somemore

we look away then look back and its GONE alrd.

*u see the chopstick at the bottom of the picture. is ZY trying to steal the nan gua bing again!

and i went to jog after going home frm AMK! :D

18 November 2010

No school today,

but i went to the hospital today.

visited both grandpa and grandma.

i feel so sad when i see grandpa.

his hands are wrapped in gloves cos he has the tendency to pull out the tubes subconsciously.

he looks so lifeless.

so heart wrenching to see it.

to think that that basket son actl didn't want to admit him in.

condition alrd so critical alrd.

slap his face!

grandma said smth that made me feel like crying.

shan't post it here though.

forced my sis to queue at popeyes with me cos i wanted to eat their biscuit.

:D

went jogging with sis (finally she said she wanna go jogging!)

when i was walking back my legs were in pain,

i almost couldn't walk properly.

):

how can this happen to me ):

19 November 2010

okay that's todayyyy!

ended school at 11am cos i decided to skip lecture to come home earlier to take a rest,

and get started on Jap.

that's right. i took a rest but Jap hasn't been touched yet omt.

stupid me.

):

supposed to go with mum to the maid agency today too.

but she is too lazy to go.

=.=

oh man i dont want a maid to stay in the house.

it freaks me out!

what if i wake up and suddenly she is staring at me!?

okay STOP scaring myself.

and no, you were never there when i needed you,

so dont come around now,

i really dont need you.

so, get lost.

#239

hoho!

ages since i came over here to blog (:

MY TWITTER AND HANDPHONE IS REALLY WEIRD.

i can't sign in twitter and my phone cannot send out SMSes.

(Y) ):

school is really hectic.

actl not hectic.

just a drag.

i just keep wanting to go home and sleep.

gosh.

i mustn't do this anymore.

):

i'm super happy now because i am going for a movie marathon today!

:D

nvm escape can wait (for another few weeks? ): )

boooooooooooooooo

but i want to go watch movieeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

okay i should stop whining.

it's irritating even me.

and shall go over to IMM from causeway point to go help LY and YT do survey :D

then they can get 3 bucks! :))

yayyy!

(my only off day)

i shall only drop back to earth tmrw.

btw, happy birthday to you.

stay happy ^^

blahhhh.

i think i have such a tiring draining life.

but hey, i dont go around telling the whole world about this because i really don't want sympathy.

though i do hope that you people would stop hoping for me to keep giving and giving, because this is just what i find myself no longer capable of doing.

okay i digressed alrd.

what i wanted to do was to write a letter to someone, someone whom i really am unable to see eye to eye with.

*in case any of you come back 4-6 years down the road later to 'settle scores', i'll just make it clear now that if you think i am referring to you, then it's you. and i gather you should self reflect rather than coming back to settle these kind of scores because if a person like me can only see the bad side of you, it means you are really pretty bad and don't have much good points.*

oh, and btw, come to me directly if you wanna know the truth, don't go to my parents. so downright embarrassing for yourself.

**disclaimer: read this with an objective view

i've never liked you much after all those stories that i heard about you since i was young. seriously, who would like a person who did black magic on his own family members, not even letting off young children of 4-6 years of age? who would like a person whose kids were such bullies and went around pinching us each time they saw us, leaving us blue blacks? but still, i tell myself to take these comments about you with a pinch of salt. they were stories that were already over, and i can't remember anything about it. those were your kids, since they are unable to behave, i guess they are just too wild. i give you the respect whenever i see you, but to the bare minimum.

i've seldom seen you around, probably because you were never around fulfilling your responsibilities. if you were, i would have definitely heard about you once or twice. and i quote from someone dear to me, "when your parents were well and healthy, u took off, running away from your responsibilities." you left the responsibilities to someone else, and now what are you back for?

what do you have to say about yourself? as much as i would still like to think of you as an okay person, i'm sorry to say that i can't bring myself to.

your mother was down with stomach flu and what were you doing? sitting in the hall the whole day, watching television. are you sure that you are able to take care of her when she goes over to where you are at when she is older?

your father was lying on the hospital bed, looking very frail, and what did you do? took your own sweet time to get to the ward, and when you were there, u went to every other person's bed instead of your own dad's and continued talking to others. when you finally came over you actually said that he looked better? were you actually around during the family meetings when they were mentioning that he is very depressed and wanted the doctor to end his life if he couldn't undergo the operation or were you fantasizing about the amount of money you were going to receive?

i don't see how your supplements are going to save his life. if you don't have money (which you do since you are always claiming you have 2324525234 maids at home) then u put in the effort. but you do nothing and hope to receive everything.

hi, but get back down to earth.

you're so great with your words and i think its very clear to everyone, including bystanders, what kind of person you are. every action that you took which i saw with my own eyes and heard with my own ears just made me feel that you are out to fight for that one thing.

you're not a good person at all. downright to the bones. don't talk about seniority and respect whenever the topic comes in because you have done nothing and deserve the same in return. you reap what you sow, sir. and the amount of great things you have done for those orphans over there are really not enough to make up for the bad karma that you have accumulated towards your own family.

so long,

SA

from: karma awaits you.