#266

With every bit of little fame i have (yes i am under the delusion that i have a bit of fame), i have decided to give whatever minutes of fame i have in my hands to this guy i met on the train yesterday. *inserts squeals here*
How romantic.

He was a really... (sorry to burst my own bubble even) rude guy.
i mean seriously, which guy can be SO crude in such a public place.
It was a train carriage of idk maybe at least 20 cabins and of the so many cabins, i HAD to meet him.
there were so many doors and he had to step through that door that i went through.
At around 11pm on a friday night, the train was relatively full.
Yes it would make sense for people to move in while they should.
Yes you do have the right to ask people to move in.
Yes it is doing the whole society a big help for voicing out your concerns on people not moving their asses to the middle of the train.

BUT
NO its not alright to shout really loudly in the train and hurl abusive language after that.
NO it isn't alright to push people (rudely i might add) to make your way through wherever you want to go.
NO it isn't alright to glare at your friend when she was hinting that you were going too far (which you definitely were, in terms of your words, not your movement to the middle of the train)

and you know what was the biggest NO-NO? you shouldn't make that move to go towards the middle of the train half-heartedly. Go on, asshole, move on straight to the middle of the train like you said people should, instead of pushing your way past people only to stand like. behind me. That means what? I was standing in front of the second person on the train seat. That is fyi not the middle of the train.
SEE, another basketcase who does not practise what he preaches.

I was really mad at him saying the cb word in public so freely. I mean, does he even know the meaning of the word? Or he doesn't mind girls scolding lj. who am i kidding, he probably uses that word as freely as the word cb. It really speaks very negatively of a person who uses such words in the public. Couldn't you be more civilised? Why are you so mad anyway? That's the way it is to take trains in SG, cope with it dude. If you want to do something about it then go ahead, but do it nicely. Things would be so different if you actually asked people to move in nicely. People would look up to you.

That's just how it is. I would even feel embarrassed because i was not right smack in the middle of the train. But all i felt was anger and distaste towards him after his little dramatic fiasco. There were all sorts of people in the train, those who had a long day at work, those going out to have fun, those going home after having a night out with friends. They don't have to deal with your little uproar about not moving in the train. Well, they should move in and they might have not, because of whatever reasons they might have. But you didn't have to spoil their whole night.

You spoilt mine.

I hope you were embarrassed. I would be embarrassed at myself. bursting out all of the sudden and having a whole lot of people stare at me, and having the person in front of me cursing me silently while really holding her tongue because she really wanted to start off with her long lecture on how you should go take up some language lessons so that they aren't so colorful.

WHY OH WHY. WHY DO PEOPLE LIKE YOU EXIST TO MAKE ME DISLIKE YOU?

PS i dont actually remember his face anymore. but i'm upset with his really rude outburst after a few hours shift of work (where some customers were seriously mean) - yeah, all anger directed towards him as a result.

#265

if i didn't go for the run today, i guess i really won't know how much pent up energy i have within me. even after sprinting during the 3km run didnt make me feel tired. i just wanted to keep going on and on. i didn't run all the way though, plenty of walking jogging and running plus sprinting throughout the whole journey.
oh i miss the days where i could just run on and on without stopping.

"gotta start training up my stamina again."
i really have to burn away the excess energy within me.
or i really dont know where i will transfer the excess energy to...
(probably a bad temper) - which i am pretty sure won't be nice.

i am WAITING for the next running man episode to be uploaded. gosh i can't wait any longer!!!
practically revolving around this show.
okay im exaggerating.
but it's really damn funny.
Korean variety shows are so dramatic because each of the person has a role to play in the variety show.
AND THEY PLAY IT SO REAL AND WELL.
"initially i thought they were gonna come into singapore but it turns out that it was just a rumour."
Soooooooooo sad.
but a sparkle of hope remains because "a news said that they MIGHT come to SG! :D"

currently watching 败犬女王.
it is super funny and sad i cried a few times.
i dont really want to comment on the acting overall
but ethan is seriously awesome.
handsome plus good acting skills.
im willing to look past any other lousy acting.
LOL.
okay jokes.
i think this show is what a lot of people can relate to these days.
fighting to be first for everything, only to realize at the end that you actually have nothing.
(his friend in the show has EXTREMELY small eyes but somehow i think he is cute :D)

#264

i'm getting a little affected by Running Man.
Oh who am i kidding. I'm SUPER affected.
i get the really cute bubbly feeling bubbling inside me when i laugh while watching the show.
ah well, the only thing that paces my life slower.

i'm gonna go into hibernation mode and withdraw contacts for a month at least. (starting from today)

day three of my injury.
it doesn't seem to be healing. (if it is, it is healing REALLY slowly.)
sian. lost so much blood and plasma.
I really think i am super pitiful.
Funniest thing is it doesn't seem to hurt.

idk what im talking about i'm rambling again.
really moodless lately.
):

#263

im back for good this time.
i miss blogging so much.

met up with hannah on tuesday and we headed over to Bugis and popped by the temple at waterloo street.
FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER, i went to try to qiu qian. (:
so very interesting! ^^

#262

i'm so upset about the irresponsible cyclists at east coast park. okay i gather that it is relatively crowded on sunday afternoons, but i think people should keep on their lanes?

i barely scraped through one hour of cycling unscathed. well, that was before someone decided to turn to look at his kid instead of in front of him, thus leading to a crash between the two of us. 

SERIOUSLY? Dude, look in front while you are cycling instead of looking at your kid on your side! if you are so darn worried about your kid, get your jogging gear and jog by his side instead. at least when you crash into someone it wouldn't hurt so much. 

i was supposed to have fun and enjoy a little bit of time with myself but you spoilt it all. well, technically you didn't spoil it all, you were the trigger. 

i think the government should really make it necessary for all cyclists to have to obtain a license before they are allowed to cycle anywhere, even at home. because seriously, they are a danger when they recklessly cycle. 

1. They don't know how to cycle in their lanes. they have 3 lanes you know. two for cycling and roller blading (to and fro), one for jogging and walking. and yet you see people jogging on cycling tracks, and cyclists cycling on jogging tracks. i really tried resisting rolling my eyes but i couldn't take it towards the end. "i think i got even more frustrated than happy cycling on a sunday afternoon."

2. Overtaking is okay, but make sure it's done safely. How on earth can you just overtake without looking at your back to see that there is no one behind you going faster?! 

3. Don't start or stop abruptly. i almost banged into quite a number of people because of that. thank god my hand was constantly on the brake bar, seriously.

4. LOOK IN FRONT. that guy who banged into me was "I SWEAR" looking for his kid for at least 5 seconds. even if he didn't drive, i bet he knows the basic rule of never looking away from your front.
i tried my best to steer away from him, and i slowed down. pity he didn't and was actually going damn hell of the fast. Instead of saying sorry the whole family started asking me if i was okay. HELL, let me bang into you and have your knee bleeding profusely and i ask you that question alright?!

ended up with me having to endure with a whole lot of stares on my way home. which made me more pissed than i already am, because it was seriously annoying. i didn't want parents telling their kids that cycling recklessly was going to make them end up like me. I KNOW IM PARANOID. but i'm seriously sure i would tell my kid that. heck, people would think it's your fault what. you're the injured.

and if things CANNOT get worse, the bus driver of the bus that i got onto was a bad driver. he striked the kerb when he was going at lower than 20km per hour. comeon, drivers know how slow that is; a cyclist can be faster than him. to top it off, he horned a car incessantly so that he could get in the lane that he wanted. *speechless* his driving is probably worse than mine.

and then my mom had to call me and related a little drama over her end and asked me to be a messanger again. *rolls eyes* and asked me to buy food home for bro. *double roll-eyes*

im hell of the upset because i got injured and fell off my bike for the first time ever, and it wasn't even my fault. damn this basket, seriously. ANGRY. ):<

okay im done ranting. off to eat tauhuay that my sis bought for me (:

#261

time can be a real bitch at times.
i can't remember how long has it been since the start of myself trying to balance every single thing that plops down in front of me in my life.

meeting up with friends is a really tough thing for me, because i need so much time with myself but i am so caught up with my daily need-to-dos that i don't even have much time for myself.
every week i'm telling myself to keep some time off for myself, but something comes up almost every time and i'm off scrambling doing something which i don't exactly want to do but feel compelled to do.
it's just always me succumbing to the responsibilities.
and when i actually really get to spend like a while off the responsibilities and do the things a 20-year old would do, i feel almost guilty when i face back to reality, or when some email comes into my inbox.
i almost dont even want to look into the mail; just feel like deleting it all off.
there's just so much a person can take, and i think i'm nearing the brim. i would like to throw someone in my circumstances and see how long they would hold out before they throw in the towel. damn it i really do.

the lack of time is precisely why i hate people cancelling out on me, and i really cannot stand it when they do it anymore. i know i used to just suck it up and take it all in, but let's just put it this way, people change. i'm sick of that nonsense and what i have to face after that timing is now BLANK. because i blanked that timing out just for you, and when you back out in the last moment, it leaves me left with one thing to do; get back to the reality and do what i should be doing. and boy, it sucks big time, especially when i was looking forward to it because it is one of my favorite activity/what i missed doing/both. and then i am back to all that i knew you couldn't be trusted kind of thing, and that kind of i'm not going to want to hang out with you every again would pop into my head.

and i'm past caring if i am being demanding or unreasonable because dude, seriously? you don't cancel out on and and go on with that pushing the blame to me kinda thing. it just gets on my nerves increasingly and i just want to slap you awake. you were the one who cancelled. you jolly well take responsibility for your own bloody actions or my reaction is my hand on your face, and i'm telling you that seriously, you wont want that. i utterly hate that because of people like you, i now already plan back up plans, and honestly, those backup plans end up sounding so much better than the outing itself i wish i went for the back up plan instead. at least i don't get disappointed with it because my backup plans don't fail; you don't fail when you plan something with yourself.

i hate you people who make me feel small. and i'm not even sorry if i leave you behind. oh, and i'm seriously past caring about the fact of anyone from my past possibly hating on me. hate me all you want, just do it openly so we don't have to feel awkwardness. i can just get past that stage and ignore your presence when i see you in the streets.